I have been reading magazines, websites, and blogs for a long time now, and I have one teeny, tiny little favor to ask of you: I need you to stop telling me what men want me to look like. I know, I know, it’s kinda your thang. Here’s why I need you to cut it out ASAP.
1. It’s a bullsh*t premise. You can’t really tell me what men like because you don’t actually know. I don’t care how many guys you surveyed; there’s no single, universally agreed-upon thing that men like when it comes to women’s looks. For every guy who likes women with long hair, there’s another guy who loves women with short hair. And for every guy who cares that much about a woman’s hair, there’s a guy who loves women for their personalities first and sees their looks as a nice bonus.
2. I can’t please everyone. Even if men did all like the same thing, that thing would be in a constant state of flux. What we find attractive is affected by so many things; there’s no guarantee that what a guy found attractive last year will be the same thing he finds attractive this year. Trends and celebrities heavily influence the beauty standard; continuing to change my hair color just to keep up with what a guy wants is just unrealistic.
3. It’s pointless information (unless the point is to make me feel like crap, in which case, it’s very good information). There’s nothing like hearing men comment on the things a woman cannot change about herself — height, weight, curves or lack thereof — to make her feel crummy. Glad to know you like tall women with round booties, Random Guy Who Knows Someone Who Works at Cosmo. I’ll get right on that bone-lengthening operation.
4. I don’t care about my looks for the men’s sake. Women know that when it comes to fashion, we are often dressing for other women, and the same goes for beauty. Whether we want our future sister-in-law to think we look pulled-together or want our boss to think we look professional, we care a lot about what other women think of us. Whether that’s a good thing or a bad thing, the fact remains: dudes are not the ones I’m trying to impress much of the time.
5. Men don’t care what I find attractive. If they did, they’d be spending more time in the weight room or growing nice beards, and less time telling strangers on the Internet what they find attractive.