I have a long and tortured relationship with running. I never really learned how to run exactly, I just sort of did it. I didn’t know you were supposed to get a good pair of sneakers, the whole mechanics of running, or that you weren’t supposed to have your first run be five miles long (no Couch to 5K for this girl).
Nope, I just decided that since all my friends did it, I should too. The first time I ran, I ran five miles without stopping and then retreated to my bed for the rest of the day. I didn’t let that stop me, I figured my body would figure out what was going on and I’d be running half marathons in a few weeks time. Obviously, I got injured fast. Did I let that stop me? Nope. Ran through any and all injuries until my body finally gave up and forced me to stop.
I took a few years off from running to let my body heal, learn how to run correctly and get a good pair of sneakers. I went for my first run in two years this morning. I warmed up with walking for five minutes, ran intervals for ten minutes, then cooled down for five minutes.
It was the same hell on earth that I remembered. Here’s what went through my mind during the worst ten minutes of my life:
- Oh God. That pavement is hard.
- My boobs must’ve grown because I don’t remember them bouncing like this before.
- What am I supposed to do with my arms? I look like a flailing hippo!
- WHY AM I DOING THIS?!?!
- Oh good. One minute down. Walking time.
- Time to run again. WHY AM I DOING THIS?!
- Not as bad this time around. I bet I look really beautiful right now. Like a Baywatch babe.
- I wonder what my cat is doing…
- If I get really good at this running thing I’m going to teach my cat to run on a leash.
- What just popped in my neck!?!?
- Where the heck is this runner’s high? I’ve been doing this for six minutes and I don’t feel anything.
- One minute left! I bet I’ve lost, like, three pounds.
So I guess it went well? I’m not sure. I’m happy I tried again though. Running has been like an old boyfriend that I just can’t seem to forget. Running and I have a complicated past, but I think if we take our time, are patient and don’t try to rush right back into things, we can work it out.